When my boys were little, I enjoyed the standard game of peek-a-boo. I got a kick out of it when they actually thought they were invisible. When a small child hides their face, they often think they are, in fact, completely hidden. But, of course, we can still see them and their cute little toddler selves.
So isn’t it ironic that we sometimes think we can hide from God?
We know that we are never hidden from God, so why do we act like we can withhold something from God?
For me, moving from hide & seek and peek-a-boo with God changed drastically during and after my engagement with counseling. I was squarely in midlife and was certain that I could no longer live the way I used to. I needed to forge a new way forward, dig deep and not hold back. I made the decision to do just that.
I decided there was nothing I wouldn’t say or do to hinder my way to as much healing as was available to me. My fear of exposure was overshadowed by my inability to maintain my former patterns of thinking and behaving.
Exposure is actually a chance to be seen. This current season is exposing layers within in all of us. You may feel exposed in uncomfortable ways these days. However, this is a chance to be seen in ways you want to and need to, but have been afraid to.
The question for this time, if you are ready for it, is this: What do you have to lose?
Some old patterns may technically work, except it’s like carrying around two 10-pound bags of potatoes with you wherever you go…Here, let me shift this so I can help you. Oh, can you hold this for me for a sec? I can’t do that right now because my hands are full. I’m so tired from carrying around all of this extra weight.
A few of our deepest needs are to be seen, known and heard. Some of us can make our way directly to God with our hidden places. Others may need to make their way to God with the help of trusted friends, spiritual directors or counselors. Either way is beautiful because it means you are becoming more whole.
So…show it all to God. Tell it like it is. It’s already happening and God knows about it. You are not hiding just because you have your hands over your eyes. That toddler game of peek-a-boo is cute with a little one, but it is an exhausting one for us if we continue to play it as an adult.
Find the freedom you desire. Take that next small, simple and gracious step forward. The one that you can see. Don’t worry about all of the other steps. The grace for each of those will be there when you get there.